kensa Posted June 17, 2012 Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 Hi All This is my first post. Discovered this website yesterday after browsing the web and it looks to be a really friendly place. I'm nervous but here goes...... Briefly, I am 39 years old and been suffering from anorexia for 10 years. Was hospitalised back in 2002 for 5 months. Ever since, I have been managing to keep my weight mostly stable since (albeit underweight at BMI 18) by keeping to a 'safe' diet. Eighteen months ago I started to suffer from severe depression again (originally developed post natal depression in 2001 but medication had been controlling it) and I am currently being tried on different anti-depressants to see which one will work. During this time I have felt myself slipping back into my anorexic ways and I seem to have lost the will to fight it. Was shocked to discover this morning that I am now only BMI 15 and this has happened quite suddenly. I am due for a review with the mental health team tomorrow and I should have been putting on weight or they were going to discharge me from outpatient care. Either that or I volunteer myself into another in-patient unit. I am a single mum with a young daughter and a job that probably won't be kept open for me much longer (been on sick leave since Feb '11). My daughter means the world to me. I stand to lose so much to this anorexia if I let it but I don't seem to be able to fight it. I know noone can give me any solutions as, ultimately, only I can help myself but I would be interested to hear of others thoughts and experiences. Thank you for taking the time to read my post. It helps me just to write it down. XXXXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PandaMonix Posted June 17, 2012 Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 honesty, this is not my area. i cant relate to this , only that we found this forum for the same reason. desperate for help. Id like you to know i sympathize for you so deepy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine001 Posted June 17, 2012 Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 Hi Kenza, welcome to the forum, I am so sorry you are struggling so much at the moment. I dont have anorexia but am a single mum who works and have depression and bpd so I know how tough it is. I can imagine that when we are unwell how easily we slip back and I am surprised your MHT are not going to support you more in the community. I guess they are worried about the risk to your health. getting well for you and your daugther is a priority. I hope you find some support with us here x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barebones Posted June 17, 2012 Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 just wanted to say welcome, and i understand a little in what ur going through as i suffer from an ED. However at the moment im having a rough time and dont feel comfortable in thoughts just now x I do hope for u and ur daughter you get through this xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kensa Posted June 17, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 Thank you PandaMonix, Christine001 and Barbones for replying, really appreciate it. Sending you all lots of hugs XXX Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PandaMonix Posted June 17, 2012 Report Share Posted June 17, 2012 Thank you PandaMonix, Christine001 and Barbones for replying, really appreciate it. Sending you all lots of hugs XXX *hugs* I hope all the best for you, i really do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kensa Posted June 20, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 20, 2012 Just an update: Had my review meeting and, thankfully, they are giving me another chance to show I can make a positive change. I am due to attend four more weekly group sessions, which includes a supported snack and lunch, and they felt it would be detrimental to my mental and physical health to discharge me now. Reviewing again at the end of July and will be allowed to continue with the CBT sessions in the meantime. If I haven't managed to restore enough weight by the next review then they are adamant that I will be discharged from the Eating Disorder Service and referred back to my GP or I can admit myself as an in-patient! Thanks for taking the time to read my post. I appreciate any comments, thoughts, etc. Need to somehow give myself a tremendous kick up the rear end as things can't go on like this . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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