IRISHGUYCORK Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Hi all i am new here and over the last few days i have made 2 posts and reviewed many others on here. I was shocked to see how many view thread compared to how many reply to them. I many cases there is threads / comments with 70-100 views and 5-10 replies. SHOCKING..... WHERE IS THE LOVE, SUPPORT, AND FRIENDSHIP ? WHY DO SOOOO MANY READ AND DONT REPLY? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE BE A BIT MORE PROACTIVE TO ALL ON HERE PLEASE. :baaasmiley: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanta Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Hi I made a topic too and it has got something like 60 plus views yet it has 7 replies but it doesn't mean no one cares, Sometimes people don't know what to say, I read a lot of threads here but some I just don't know what to say but it doesn't mean I don't care or support or show my friendship to those that are struggling.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morethanme Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 hi how are u ? trouble is u cant answer everyone or sometimes u read a thread and u dont know howw to reply for various reasons doesnt mean no one cares. ive had several posts that get no repies but thats hiw it goes. i think everyone is as supportive as they can be. mtm xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aurorablues Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Hiya, There can be a number of different reasons for this; Sometimes some members are not to sure what to say, or they are in a bad place themselves, or have every intention of replying at a later date but may forget. Or what a member was going to reply with has already been stated many times. There are also many members that are not very active on here post wise and come on here just to read which can make them feel better, or sometimes some members may reply to the things they relate to more. You may also find that one particular member has gone back to the same thread 10 or so times before they can think of specific reply and may also go back to edit any spelling mistakes/add more to their reply/check for updates etc, and the Thread poster will go back to the thread on numerous occasions to read over their post again, maybe edit and to check for replies, which all notches up the thread views. It's not just this forum, it's every forum out there, there is always more views than replies on threads. Doesn't mean this place isn't supportive. We all try our best. Aurora :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 i think you could probably partly answer your own question being as you freely admit "reviewing many" posts and don't appear to have answered any posts outside your own topics.... why didn't you reply to any of them? not attacking you - merely asking the question... alot of people read posts and dont reply cos they feel they have nothing to contribute to the subject. it is not always clear from the title what the post is about... remember it is times the thread has been read and NOT the number of different people who have read it - so i would imagine that quite a few views could have been mods / mini mods checking posts from time to time, as well as people who have replied checking back to see further replies... some people even read and go away to have a think and then come back and post thus upping the view numbers... the numbers you quote are actually quite average for this forum... bit early in your membership to condemn the place... it's been a big help to me for one... remember that alot of stuff here triggers people differently and i have always found that people will reply when they are able to... it's definitely the best forum i have found for this stuff... give it a chance, it may well surprise you... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 I must admit I find it hurtful when I do a topic and get no (or very few) replies. The difficulty is that you don't always know what to say. For example, if someone does a topic about anorexia, I've never experienced that so it might seem crass if I reply. Also, we are all busy and I just don't have the time to reply to everything that I read. The key is to concentrate on quality, not quantity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanta Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 I have just looked at your topics IRISHGUY and they do have replies so I don't really know what your getting at.xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jades Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 i do agree things can be read so many times and so little replies, can really make u feel even more shit! i've been here for years and things go in ebbs and flows sometimes. yes, sometimes can't be bothered for their own reasons and it makes the thread writter feel shit! and yes popularity sometimes comes into play tho not many like to admit that. as far as being new, that too can hinder replies just cuz they don't know enough to be there for u. i wouldn't give up...we all had to start somewhere.. people have to get to know eachother sometimes and sometimes that's knowing people will not have enough to give back but thought enough to read. don't knof if that's of any help but sometimes anything is better than nothing..yes/no? xxxx hope that things pick up a bit for u and u find perhaps more usefull things than i could offer xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pickle59 Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 (((IrishguyCork))) I am so pleased you have had a lot of replies here, and it is a lot, all with very good points, observations, experience of this forum and other forums, so I hope you will perhaps reconsider the love, support and friendship here.x Compared to quite a few people here, who really engage in welcoming and interracting as best able for reasons stated, (many different ones) I am a relative newbie, 3 months coming up. I am still learning how it works. I wonder myself sometimes why more newbies don't hang around here, but as said it does take time. It hurt me a bit to see your post actually initially, and I'm not proud to say pressed some of my not so nice buttons, cos even though it was a general post I did feel a bit personally attacked. So all I'm trying to say is, I have viewed this post at least 10 times or so before being able to reply. I do feel for you as I know that the Health system in Ireland is very very expensive. I hope you will take on what everyone has said here and hope to see you around here more. Pickle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 I agree with what everyone else has said here Personally I try to reply to posts as much as I can Notice the key word here is "can" There are times when I just can't, because I am either in a really shit place myself or I just don't have the words I would rather post something productive then just post for the sake of posting. However I do often just post when I have nothing to say to reassure people someone is listening and that I care. I myself did reply to your post, im sorry if I missed something or didn't reply or something. I just forget sometimes as I'm just wandering around the forum a lot. At times I come on here at 3 or 4 am and just read posts because it makes me feel safe knowing I'm not the only one going through this I do not get pleasure out of people's sadness, don't get me wrong, I just feel as if I have people to relate to. And hopefully friends now, I'm sorry you feel this way, but you haven't been on here long And I would hope you don't already cloud your view because I can assure you the people on here are the most selfless and supportive people I've ever met We are all struggling and going through so much and there's only so much we can do Personally I've found the support amazing, even of I get one reply to a post it shows me someone cares And when I see I have 70 views I take it as someone has listened to how I feel I try not to see it as rejection I know it's hard But you are welcome here, just give it a chance ey? Tan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrippleAndStarfish Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 sometimes i read and don't have a clue what to say, or maybe i'm not in the right headspace at that particular moment to construct even the most simple of sentences, and so i go away from the topic without replying. it's not anything personal against anyone, it's just that ability is beyond me at that time. Happens with a lot of people. Often, esp with the nature of this forum, there may be a fair few of us who aren't on top form and aren't able to focus energy right there and then to helping others, but this balances itself out over time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guntarded Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Note responses above, you are not ignored or being ignored. I hope these replies has given you some validation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barebones Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 like above. also remeber everytime your looking at your post, it is counting also to that. Hope your alright, everyone has suggested why not everyone or every post will get a reply by everyone, its kinda impossible. huggles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagleheart Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 I am in crisis right now,but felt i had to post a reply.I have no words to help.I'm just letting you know that i read most topics,but often,my head is so messed up that i have nothing of use to say.Like right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christine001 Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 I havent read all of this thread but just wanted to point something out. if you get 10 replies and each time a new post is added these 10 people checking in to read these posts this makes 100 views, see what I mean 100 views doesnt mean 90 people not replying. I agree not having replies feels shit but try to keep it in perspective x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddy harper Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 i think this forum is really supportive . Sad that u dont think the same Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IRISHGUYCORK Posted June 29, 2012 Author Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 I have just looked at your topics IRISHGUY and they do have replies so I don't really know what your getting at.xxxx GROWLY CAT - if you read my 1st comment on the thread you will see it refers to the general overview of my first impressions on here after i have viewed many peoples comments. It didnt ever isolate or refer to my unhappiness regarding replies to my own thread. As regards to many saying they dont reply sometimes because they just dont know what to say, well i think its fair to say me included that many on here many be in a bad place in life, they may or maybe be isolated, lonely, lost, or a host of many other feelings. Soooo if a person cant give any advice thats ok but a simple hello, with support comments is something we ALL can do. It costs nothing, but it can have a massive effect. Well that MY opinion anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Soooo if a person cant give any advice thats ok but a simple hello, with support comments is something we ALL can do. It costs nothing, but it can have a massive effect. Well that MY opinion anyway. so i ask again, why didnt you do that with the "many" posts that you say you yourself have read ? lead by example rather than laying the guilt trip on people who may themselves be struggling and find even simple words hard atm... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Data Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 You say you are shocked by the lack of support here. I am shocked by the power of love that this forum gives . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villan Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 You say you are shocked by the lack of support here. I am shocked by the power of love that this forum gives . slightly off topic - but data - seriously TUNE :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tan19 Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 I think if you give this place more of a chance it may just surprise you I have to be honest that I was slightly upset when first reading your reply here because as you can see a lot of people took the time to answer you here and reassure you But you didn't seem to acknowledge that atall But maybe that's me being over sensitive You are right we are all going through a bad place but I honestly do believe we all do our very best And you shouldn't expect things from people, they can only give what they feel like they can, myself included I hope that if you give it a chance and not judge this place so quickly that it will be of much use to you x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyP Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 theres no obligation to post each time you read something, dont impose rules on people especially when your new and havent given it a chance. personally id rather have a couple genuine comments which mean something than a load of empty posts cos people are obliged to reply Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddy harper Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 good reply tan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanta Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 I have just looked at your topics IRISHGUY and they do have replies so I don't really know what your getting at.xxxx GROWLY CAT - if you read my 1st comment on the thread you will see it refers to the general overview of my first impressions on here after i have viewed many peoples comments. It didnt ever isolate or refer to my unhappiness regarding replies to my own thread. As regards to many saying they dont reply sometimes because they just dont know what to say, well i think its fair to say me included that many on here many be in a bad place in life, they may or maybe be isolated, lonely, lost, or a host of many other feelings. Soooo if a person cant give any advice thats ok but a simple hello, with support comments is something we ALL can do. It costs nothing, but it can have a massive effect. Well that MY opinion anyway. But as villan has pointed out why don't you reply too? It sounds like you're guilt tripping us as it has already been said, I find this place to be supportive, Why are you even posting this thread? We have all been newbies here and it takes time to settle in, Sometimes I still get nervous about posting about myself but I am just glad in writing stuff down I don't think about getting replies, I just feel better getting it all off my chest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maddy harper Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 why not turn this forum to your advantage u can get a lot of support from us if u give us the chance to give it to u. Maybe post a topic so we can find out more about your self so we can give u the support your really wanting... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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