The Funfair In My Mind..

[Tiggsy]

Ok so first i've just realised ive found this section of the fourm, which means ive probably posted some stuff in the wrong section.. sorry

Also, "The FunFair in my mind" is a new phrase my best mate came up with for me, he says his is a ghost train (hes stressed) and mine is the FunFair

Anywho....

So i've been reffered to the hospital to see a consultant in psychiatry... in the meantime I stared some counselling, and HATE it. Not so much the act of going but the woman. she DOES NOT HELP IN THE SLIGHTEST. I was explaining about taking things th wrong way, and the reasons i feel i need to hurt myself and she was just like "well stop doing that"

You dont SAY?! Mate, if it was THAT easy I wouldnt be sat there!!!

She wanted a brief history of my life, IE key events that may be whats causng issues for me now, and when I mentioned i had a misscarriage last summer she looked like she might cry. I of course, was sat there tears pouring down my face, but i kinda felt like saying, this is MY sh*t not yours, you need to help me deal with it surely, not share my grief??

I've got nothing to go on really, so your advice/comparrisons/comments would be helpful... although i have made the dessicion to discharge myself from counselling (had two sessions), wait for my refferal apointment to come through, and deal with stuff then. Sigh!!

[Kitsune]

Sometimes some counsellors just really aren't worth their salt, telling you to stop doing it is not helpful and was probably spoken like a true non Sharmer. It comes down to them just being people, people with a large responsibility yes but people who are still fallible. I've had quite a few and I've rarely got on with the NHS ones, and had a few bad private ones. I had one excellent one thougb so it's about finding the right person for you.

As for her tearing up, I can understand why it'd piss you off as it is your pain and not hers. However any key part of a theraputic relationship is a certain level of attachment and at least of empathy and attempt at understanding from the therapist. It may be that she has had a similar thing happen to her or someone she loves and it has brought up some of her 'stuff'. It's pretty normal, but again false sympathy can really piss me off if I can tell it's done on purpose.

She may truly have felt for you, if she didn't at least partly care on some level she wouldn't be doing the type of job she does. Of course that doesn't mean that she's any good at it

How long is your therapy for? if it's short term you can maybe ride it out and see how it goes, see if you start to get on any better after initial misgivings?

Perhaps the psychiatrist could point you in the right direction once you've seen them? If you don't get on with your counsellores you're well within your rights to ask to see someone else- therapy won't work for you if you don't get on with your therapist. But beware of the trap of feeling you don't get on if they 'push' you because there's a certain amount of challenge in therapy which will make you hate the therapist at times!

Therapy is advisable as an adjunct to medication as it's rare that meds alone will help fully.

Hope this helped! xx

[EmilyStrange]

I avoid female counsellors/psychiatrists like the plague... they get my back up for some reason. I saw a female counsellor a year ago, and it didn't end well and I raged at her. I set up some counselling lately (I have access to several therapists right now) and I told the intake worker (female) that it couldn't be her, and that it had to be a male. I know that she was take aback.. but I got my way and get to see a male.

[Tiggsy]

Thanks for replies guys

I cancelled my appointment for this morning and (I think) discharged myself... But the woman I spoke to when I called said she'd have to get my counciller to call me back, two days later and ive had no call...

The thought of attending th sessions was actually stressing me out more than anything else latly. I feel good for loads of reasons at the mo, but not going today really helped. I'm still waiting on my refferal apointment though, so when I go to that I'll mention i tried the counsilling but this particular one didnt work... No doubt there'll be more to come anywho!!

I was debating the whole male/female thiing... for some thing s I guess I'd prefer to talk to a female, but then again, males who have the sympathy levels for women whove been through sh*t really appeal to me on the right level... (one of my best mates is male) and I sometimes connect better.

Watch this space I guess...

PS apologies for spelling... I'm on the cider