skp67 Posted December 27, 2013 Report Share Posted December 27, 2013 My cpn says i am the most self loathing she has ever worked with, i have zero confidence in anything. Over the last 2 days i have tried with pressure to eat 2 small child like amounts of meals. I have been punishing myself in my head and doing extra sit ups when i get the chance. My brain rules everything if i havent done enough then i wake up in the night and do another 500 sit ups then i can rest. Why is it i am having such a horrible relationship with food. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Becca95 Posted December 27, 2013 Report Share Posted December 27, 2013 Because you're ill Scally. It's such a horrible illness and I'm so sorry for you. You shouldn't self loathe because you are a strong and determined person, don't give up! Easier said than done I know because I struggle with that myself. Whether you think it or not, you've made a big step and have done something very brave by eating those meals. Maybe you could work on doin it again but doing less sit ups, you were ok before so why not, it won't hurt you. Take things at your own pace but try doing something slighty different everytime so you won't notice a change much. It's just an idea I send you all the luck in the world and we all believe in you, we know you can do it. Also sending hugs, everyone needs those! Take care Scally xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Threemoons Posted December 27, 2013 Report Share Posted December 27, 2013 Hi Scally! I agree with Becca, you have an illness with food. I congratulate you for having eaten these child meals, every meal you take is a step toward recovery. You'll also need to reduce your sit-up but I'm aware you can't change this all at once, it will be baby steps after baby steps. Try to challenge the illness a bit everyday. And something important: don't get angry with yourself if you don't succeed at something, as long as you're willing to try again next time it's fine. I've faith in you, Scally. Sending you some good hugs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skp67 Posted December 29, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 29, 2013 Thank you for your replies Now the festivities are over my brain has reverted again Restricting is going on, i havent eaten anything in the last 2 days and drunk around 500 ml of water. I am getting that dizy, head about to explode feeling again but to see the sacles go the way i want is better. I was terrified when i stood on them on Friday but it wasn't too bad just need to shift 4lbs to get back to what i was. I have to see a gp who hates me tomorrow as i want my AD increased but i dare say he'll say no, so i think i'll cancel the appt. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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