ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 A bloke is obsessed with my son, he has threatened to kill my cats, he turned up this evening, my son went mental and the bloke left, but we didn't know he was sitting outside our door, he accidentally coughed so my son went mad again when we realised he was there so he rang the police (999) but something happened and he didn't say anything to the woman officer, then my son put the phone down. Then the bloke shouted that my cat was outside, Ellie is a house cat and is too scared to go out, he stole my cat so I lost it then, and opened the door, everything kicked off and there was screaming and shouting, I got Ellie back, and my neighbour came running up the stairs and the bloke left. My landline number is private, so the police won't know who we were but then my son admitted that this bloke has been calling him "hot and gorgeous" this bloke also has said to me about wanting to rape me, he has said this in front of my son, my son admitted he is scared to have a bath etc (he is a boxer, my son, he is never usually scared) Should I ring 101 and say that this man keeps turning up? He keeps buying my son things even though I have asked him not to and my son has too. But he keeps turning up with things for us. Will the police be able to work out who called them or should I ring 101 and tell them or should I hope that this stops? I need to protect my son and now and scared to leave him alone in our home. Edit: It all started about 9.30pm my son called the police at about 12pm. Thank you for any insight/advice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dice Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 If you put 141 a number before you call it, It will withhold your number, So it should work with any number your calling... I think you need to call and get this sorted as soon as you can for you and C!!!... Sorry I cannot help anymore or give you any advice/insight... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Thanks Dice I have ejust rang them theyy are coming out now. Thank you x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dice Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Good I am glad your rang them and they are coming straight out to you both!!!... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Life is fucked, Fucking hate it all. Fucking hate sick people. There is nowhere to turn. And why are some police lovely and some make us feel like the shittest person in the world? Another can of fucking worms opened now. Why the hell do they just not leave me and my son alone? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Dice, I just want to say you are always a good friend, you care so much. You always have the right judgement, I never know what to do in any situation, but you do and your advice is invaluable. x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel tears Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Hi How did it go with the police?, I hope that they sort it for you. That guy is well out of order and nobody should have to feel frightened. Hugs xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 He denied everything except coming round. The police said to keep the door locked at all times, which I do at night anyway but will now do in the day. I'm also going to get a spyhole thing fitted as I need to know if it's him that keeps turning up in the middle of the night. I'm also going to look for a transfer out of the town, need to be away and safe. So, so exhausted of relentless horrible stuff. Really want it all to just go away :'( HUgs back (((AT))) xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pepsimeg Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Oh sorry I didnt read this earlier ILH Thks is so horrible I hope you can get sorted. You did right to ring police Please keep safe all of you Emo xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubbles.. Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 (((ILH))) The guy sounds creepy, I would be scared too, Glad you called the police. Please stay safe. xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buzzybee Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 You need to keep a log of every incident, every interaction with this man, times, dates, what was said by him, what you said etc….. I don't know how old the man is? How does your son know him etc……Did you give a full statement to the police? and did they write everything down? Im pretty surprised that they aren't looking into a public order offence, or even harassment, due to the fact that he has threaten to kill your cats, and has been harassing your son. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Thanks Emo and Bubbles (((xxx))) Buzzybee, The police have done nothing at all. They were horrible, I know this man, we were friends, but when he started coming round more, he started treating me like rubbish, like really insulting, obscene etc. Then my son told me all and last night was the pinnacle of overstepping the mark. They have told me to ring them if he turns up. That's it along with the above 'advice' They actually asked me if I was my son's biological mother????!!!! I was dumbfounded. I can't work that out at all? Nothing done about my son or my cats, nothing. Unbelievable. Everything is a huge massive, disturbing mess and for some reason me and my son attract these predators. Every single time. It is literally ongoing. He won't turn up now because he knows this would destroy his life if it got out in this town. He has just been taught the biggest lesson of his life. seriously, he is the petrified one now. Not us. They wrote nothing down...which kind of makes me wonder.... xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheartemma Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 (((((ILH))))) I'm glad you feel he'll have to leave you alone from now on but it's terrible the police treated you so badly. I would have thought it was their job to write everything down even if they did have (completely unreasonable) doubts. The question about whether you are your son's biological mother was awful, none of their business, completely irrelevant as far as I can see. I don't see how it would have made a difference if you weren't but they had no reason at all to ask that, so belittling. I tend to get people being horrible to me as well, I think people sense vulnerability and for some reason they think it's a sign we're bad in some way. I don't understand that. If someone is vulnerable I would want to look after them, not make them feel worse. I think you would be within your rights to complain about how the police treated you but maybe it's better not to cause any extra stress for yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 9, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Thanks Emma x I know, I really can't work out why they asked me that and wrote absolutely nothing down. You're right, if you see someone vulnerable you want to help them, especially you Emma, cause you're so lovely xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dice Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Dice, I just want to say you are always a good friend, you care so much. You always have the right judgement, I never know what to do in any situation, but you do and your advice is invaluable. x I just want to say; If the foot was on the other shoe and it was me going through this, I am sure very sure you would say the same and more to me... Some times when we're in the middle of the storm, We just have no clue what we should do or see away around it... I hope you are going to put a complaint in about this pig, Who dared to ask such a offensive question about if you was C's biological mother!!! I find with the police; You will get some nice ones and then you get the totally prats who think they're better than everyone, As they are in the police and have power over us... I hope he does not come back or anything but if he dares to come again record on your phone what he is saying and things, Or if he sends messages save them and keep it all logged, So whether he try's to denying again you have proof in black and white... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PDBPD Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Is this sorted out now? Steve Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buzzybee Posted April 9, 2014 Report Share Posted April 9, 2014 Im pretty disgusted that the police didn't even take a statement. hmmm, considering the bad press they are getting at the moment, they need to be responding to complaints more sympathetically. You could complain to the IPCC, with regards to the police handling of your complaint and that no statement was taken etc and you have been quite simply left. if you are sure that the man in question will not bother you again and that you, your son and your cats will not be in any further danger of harassment/ threats, then it needs to be your choice is you want to pursue the matter further via the IPCC. I think you said in a previous post that your son is 17? sorry if I got that wrong, if he is 17, he's still a minor and vulnerable to possible exploitation (surprised that the police didn't even go down that avenue). You could speak to your local MP, just to test the waters, if you don't want to explore the IPCC route x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ILostHer Posted April 11, 2014 Author Report Share Posted April 11, 2014 He turned up this evening, he tried the door handle and I heard him clear is throat on purpose. I shouted through the door because I typically lost it instead of ringing the police, because those two coppers were so horrible. But I rang my landlord this morning about getting a peephole, they said they'd put a request in. If he turns up again then I will be able to see him and ring the police because I will have proof it's him, because some people will know that the police can be or make us feel like we are 'mistaken' and I hate that, which is why I say stuff instead to the perpetrator. I just can't believe the police didn't do anything enough to stop him coming round. All I know is my son is scared and that those police didn't care enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kitsune Posted April 11, 2014 Report Share Posted April 11, 2014 Once you get that peephole if he comes round again maybe you could use a phone or something to video record through the peephole and engage him a bit? If that would work you would have him on tape and that's cold hard evidence. Or maybe you could get some kind of CCTV outside your flat? That's if he comes round again. I hope he doesn't because he sounds like a nasty piece of work. Take care of yourself and C, keep safe. Hope this gets resolved for you soon. I can't imagine what you are going through, but you're still standing hun, you're strong xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lonelyheartemma Posted April 14, 2014 Report Share Posted April 14, 2014 I'm sorry he came round again, it really does sound terrifying but I can't blame you at all for not phoning the police after last time. I hope you can get a peep hole soon. I like Kitsune's idea of photographing or filming him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JustOneMore Posted April 27, 2014 Report Share Posted April 27, 2014 Get the Chief Inspector around and make a complaint about the idiotic copper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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