angel tears Posted August 24, 2014 Report Share Posted August 24, 2014 Hi I was told last week that I have got Bpd and bipolar due to my mood swings and the fact that mood stabilisers work so well for me, without it I crash and end up very depressed and agitated like I am now. How do you find your way through the mood swings and the depression, agitation?. Thanks xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peregrine Posted August 25, 2014 Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 I have been diagnosed with BPD, bipolar 2 and CPTSD. I've had 3 major depressive episodes in my life so far which required hospitalisations. Hypomania was less prevalent in that they only lasted a couple of weeks or so whereas i can be depressed for months. I'm sure that the short mood swings are due to BPD triggers and me not being able yet to deal with them but I'm convinced that this can be worked on, as they are rollercoaster shortterm things that always follow a trigger. To me, stability is key, not being in a confusing relationship and staying celibate for now. I keep friendships at an arm's length, as i know it's relationship dynamics that set me off the most. BUT i don't see this as healthy either. We need people in our lives. I hope to address this in upcoming therapy. Everyone is different, and this is something that worked for me. Building a life of my own. The sharp urges to sh have subsided in the past year by religiously writing my diary and using this as a way of understanding myself, others and situations. I practise yoga to stay grounded and do regular exercise. My job is physical too. Reading through this, it so sounds up my own arse and i hope it's not perceived as that. It is only what works for me and i had to work hard to get it. Could not have done it without help and medication which are varying doses of ad's and ap's. I hope this helps and wish for you that you can find a way that suits your life. If i had a perfect solution i wouldn't engage in therapy again. Stick with it, angel, and i hope you have an easy day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riverspell Posted August 25, 2014 Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 I've been diagnosed with multiple mental illnesses. One of which is schizo affective bipolar. Though my doctor found this diagnoses a bit rocky as I don't have a typical pattern for bipolar. She called it atypical bipolar instead of one or two and also diagnosed me as having atypical mania. Which I guess can be a bit crazier at times than mania. Course I'm not sure I actually believe that as my mom has traditional mania and we seem to behave nearly the same when it strikes. Except that I can become more volatile and aggressive for extended periods than she does. I'm still learning to navigate the minefield that is mood swings and the sudden "slamming into a brick wall of sudden steady mood". As such my coping mechanisms do sometimes change or get modified. When I hit my periods of outright aggressive and hostile behavior I tend to shut myself up in my room to avoid others until I can calm myself down. Otherwise it's harder to control my urges to scream, yell, hit, fight and otherwise cause mass chaos. Often I grab a pillow and beat the crap out of an inanimate object until I wear myself out. As to mood swings, which I often compare to a crazed and deviled carnival, I deal with it depending on which mood has decided to sucker punch me until it moves on to another. This works out as long as my mood swings stick to a typical pattern. Sometimes they hit me every few minutes and I find only a cup of tea or manic pacing help (in the case of pacing I tend to now just take a walk outside). My depressive episodes are harder for me to deal with. I've been diagnosed with BPD as well and this complicates my moods by worsening them as I have little to no control over my emotions. In general my mood is what an average person would call "meh" or "just ok". Pretty much I'm constantly in some form of a depressed mood. But during my depressive episodes I'm often if not always bordering on suicidally depressed. When they occur I set myself small goals each day and ask someone to help remind me to do the basics like eating something, taking care of hygiene and in general getting my ass out of bed. Doesn't always work but it helps in the long wrong. I'm sorry I couldn't be more helpful but you're welcome to message me anytime should you want to talk to someone. =) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel tears Posted August 25, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 Hey they are great replies thanks. My moods are all over the bloody place, it's driving me potty. They are weird because they change over a few days sometimes though the depression is much more severe. Today I have been very depressed but agitated and hyper sexual.... Good job I am on my own!!!! Lol. I can then just release it instead of trying to hold it all in with a lid that wants to burst!!!! I think my initial dose of quetiapine isn't enough... It worked for about 5 days now I am all over again!!! Xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peregrine Posted August 25, 2014 Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 Sounds stressful. You've had so much going on lately it's not surprising you're left right and centre. Maybe you can build routines into your day (if you haven't got any already) to help you along. They don't have to be chores. Stuff you enjoy. For a while i bought myself a pen every day. A different one, different colour and then i doodled with it for a while. It's daft and got a bit expensive but it got me out of the house and it was nice to choose something for myself on a daily basis. Thinking of you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lapwing Posted August 25, 2014 Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 I have bipolar 1, diagnosed long before BPD... full blown psychotic highs/lows/mixed states (which are the worst). Probably tried 25+ meds over the years. Currently on a cocktail of 6, including some PRNs. I don't really cope, but I'd like to know how... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel tears Posted August 25, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 25, 2014 Thanks for your replies ((((everyone)))). I think that I am having mixed episodes.... Very deep depression mixed with agitation, hyper sexual, psychosis last week for days, anger episodes and today I am shaking all day like a leaf?? Dunno what that's about. Xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
addy2 Posted August 26, 2014 Report Share Posted August 26, 2014 Ive been diagnosed with loads of different illness's too and I never know if I'm coming or going the meds I am on are for bipolar it's quietapine and trazadone and I suffer from visual hallucinations they won't tell me my dx anymore just give me bits like my dbt therapist said I have a dissasociative disorder and gave me a book on DID my new therapist said she is picking up more on the PTSD side of things whereas my psychiatrist still talks about Bpd, OCD, depression and the hallucinations I'm confused to say the least. He said I need to stabilise my moods I'm thinking in anxious what else is there, I used to be up and down up for about a week down for months and then up but not anymore I went down last October and it hasn't came up just gave me loads of anxiety and fear on top of it I still get impulsive and sh. Hugs angel I wish I could help I just wanted to let you know I can relate to all the confusion and being given different dx xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lapwing Posted August 27, 2014 Report Share Posted August 27, 2014 Sorry about my earlier post, I wasn't in the best frame of mind. Although I've been through lots of meds, the ones I take now seem to work better than anything before... Lithium, lamotragine, duloxetine, chlorpromazine, diazepam prn, promethazine prn. In terms of trying to find coping strategies - CBT and DBT based approaches have worked for both 'issues' and in general, I try to deal with the symptom rather than worrying about which illness is causing it. I'm sorry you're having mixed episodes, not nice at all - have you got any medical support to help with this? xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel tears Posted August 27, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 27, 2014 Hi I am so confused with what's going on with me. I see another p doc yesterday and she said she thinks she knows what's going on with me but she didn't want to say until she has been through my notes and seen how I get on at the day hospital!!! It's so confusing..... I am on trazadone and quetiapine... But now they don't want to alter the dose for a while. They want me to see how I go.... I feel like an experiment!!!. Feeling up, down and sad. I am trying to manage it on my own but I feel played with. One dr will give me meds and another won't If I could I would go private. I have been dx with borderline, PTSD, schizophrenia, bipolar, depression and DID. Confusing!!!! Xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peregrine Posted August 27, 2014 Report Share Posted August 27, 2014 Hiya. I have found that the more doctors i went to the more diagnoses i got and it seems that others had the same experience. For the past three years i have stuck with the same mental health team and it was only a couple of months ago that CPTSD was added to the mix. I totally understand your confusion and frustration at not knowing what's going on. After getting the CPTSD, i was thrown a bit and the first thing i did was go online and get books. I have now come to the conclusion that all of these dxs are overlapping and i take a wild guess that this is true for many with prolonged mental health issues. The most important thing alongside educating yourself about all of this is to manage symptoms. If meds are not working at all after a few weeks they should be changed or dosage altered. I used to define myself by whichever diagnosis was prevalent and i think it's a natural thing to do, especially when i didn't know what was going on for me. I still do it when times are tough. But I've also found that in whole heartedly accepting diagnoses, i limited myself within the symptoms and expressions of each illness. I'm now trying to see this as a challenge and the meds i take help me function to go about my daily business. With BPD especially, i feel i can do things to change my thought processes and alert behaviour. At times it's tedious and i can't see the point when so many others around me breeze dancing and clapping through life. But I'm mortified at viewing myself and the rest of my life being lumbered with issues, restraining myself from contact with people, family, joy and fun. Some meds target the same problem. On a simple scale, there are various painkillers out there, doing the same thing but some prefer one type to another. Amitriptylin is used for depression but also as painkiller. I don't know if any of this is helpful but maybe, as an act of self kindness you can take all your troubles that cause you these symptoms and keep them all together for now. We are such complex creatures, trying to dissect things makes it all the more confusing. As for the doctors who are masters at doing this, good for them, as long as they help treat symptoms. Maybe you can voice your confusion to them? In my eyes, you are all of these, as I'm all of mine. But we are so much more, can explore and grow and outgrow. I wish you so much kindness through this process. Given to you by others and also you giving to yourself. It's a huge challenge, but I'm convinced, it's a challenge that can be met. Stay strong. You've come this far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lapwing Posted August 28, 2014 Report Share Posted August 28, 2014 Just wanted to whole heartedly agree with everything Fabhcun said below - the longer I've spent on this trip through mental health, the more adopting this approach has helped... but it took me a long time to get there, I used to obsess about getting a diagnosis, thinking it would fix everything - it hasn't for me, but then that's maybe just me... I used to define myself by whichever diagnosis was prevalent and i think it's a natural thing to do, especially when i didn't know what was going on for me. I still do it when times are tough. But I've also found that in whole heartedly accepting diagnoses, i limited myself within the symptoms and expressions of each illness. I'm now trying to see this as a challenge and the meds i take help me function to go about my daily business. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel tears Posted August 29, 2014 Author Report Share Posted August 29, 2014 Thanks guys xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grummessi Posted October 1, 2014 Report Share Posted October 1, 2014 I just got diagnosed with both well 2 weeks apart.I had a history of agraphobia anxiety hallucinations depressions and hypomanic states , anyway hopefully i can try get better now.Hope you're ok too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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