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Anxiety Getting So Bad.


Eagleheart

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Too many things going on atm.

I have to fill in an esa form.They wrote to me last year & told me they would not do anything about my DLA until 2015 at the earliest.

Now,all of a sudden,i have to go through the whole ESA thing.When the form arrived,i went & got the hammer & pounded hell out of myself.Then i cut.Then i clawed off a patch of skin.

I tried filling out the form today but quickly flipped into a panic attack.

I can't handle this shit.

On top of that,i had the s**t ripped out of me on my fb page,by my cousin.It was totally unprovoked & so cruel & had me believing that i was a bad person.I got so anxious about it & it's on my mind ALL the time.She's family,ffs.

People keep turning on me.It must mean that i AM evil.If i'm not evil,why does this keep happening to me?

I am deeply confused & upset.I am SHing a lot.

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Hey eagle, good to see you back around the place.

I can understand your anxiety peaking with what is happening in your life atm. I am sorry about the fb issues and your family stuff. You are not evil. Sometimes life is awfully tough for some of us, seemingly totally unfairly. Please do not see it as an assessment of your character.

As for the ESA / DLA form problem, is there any way you could get a mh advocate to help you deal with it? Maybe MIND or somewhere could help? I know from experience how stressful contact from these benefits places can be. If you can't get any outside help could you ask your partner to help you fill it in?

Sorry if none of these suggestions are any good to you. I really feel for you. xxx

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Hi eagle, I don't really have any constructive advice atm. I'm sorry your cousin is being horrid. I helped my father in law fill in his forms they are really difficult to do and long winded to say the least. Is there anyone that could help you fill the forms in maybe? Xx

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Artemis,so sorry for not replying to such a thoughtful post. I've spent the day in such a high state of anxiety i just couldn't function. I started getting bad chest pains i thought i was having a heart attack,but it was my costo-chondritis,so that was a relief. I did manage to track down an advocacy service for my area & will contact them tomorrow. I am utterly exhausted & quite run down. Smoking way too much too,but not in a fit state to tackle that atm. I am proud of myself for getting through today without SHing excessively. I really hope to get a decent sleep. I quickly go loopy when i am sleep deprived. Anyway,i've rambled on too much. Sorry. But please know that your post was helpful. And comforting.xxx

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Dear Distracted,thankyou so much for replying to my post. I appreciate it so much,knowing that you are not feeling good atm. That takes strength & thoughtfulness so i want you to know how much it means that you took the time to offer me comfort. You lovely person.xxx

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